Friday, October 14, 2011

You put up with me for 9 years!!??? You MUST be CRAZY!!!

So, October is a special month.   This week marked 3 months home with our beautiful children.  First post-placement report finished and sent in... CHECK! 

This weekend we celebrate 6 years of marriage.  At the end of the month my wife and I will have been a couple for 9 years. 

So, to my lovely wife... thank you for putting up with me and all of my anal, perfectionist, can't leave well enough alone issues.  We are truly lucky that we found each other and it is funny at times how well our individual un-stereotypical strengths complement each other... (AND that after 9 years we still compliment each other). 

I'm happy that we have several common interests that we can share and enjoy together...AND I'm glad we each have our own things that the other couldn't care less about - so we don't get in each others way while enjoying them!   :-)  

Sharing brownies with you and bonding over our love of chocolate = similarity = GOOD. 

You drinking milk with that brownie and not touching my Diet Pepsi = difference, and also = VERY GOOD.  

I cook - you eat.  You do laundry - I wear clothes.  It's like a perfect match... who could PLAN that sort of thing?  I mean, you have good taste in men...I have good taste in women!  See, there's just a neverending list of why we work together. 

I'm glad and thankful for the series of events (that I don't believe is at all "coincidental") that brought us together. 

Happy Anniversary!  Hope you can tolerate me for many more years to come!!

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

What's in the microwave???

So, recently (like VERY recently, in fact I can't believe I'm up at almost midnight typing this post instead of going to sleep and getting rest while I have a friggin' chance to!!) my wife and I adopted 2 children from Ethiopia.  They are absolutely awesome and it has truly been a joy having them join our family and getting to know them these past few months. 

However, my wife and I got ill before ever leaving the U.S. to pick up our children (once everything was cleared AFTER SEVERAL MONTHS and we were allowed to go and get them).  So, we did the 20+ hour flight and dealt with a 10 hour time difference all with respiratory infections.  Basically, we felt like crap. 

Of course we didn't have time to adjust to time change and rest up or anything... we immediately went to visit our children the day we arrived.  Then the following day we took custody of them for good (YAY!!!).  As awesome as it was to FINALLY have our children (after a nearly 3 year adoption process) we were miserable. 

We were a jetlagged, ill, tired, and cranky couple that with the swipe of a pen transformed from a couple to a family of four.  Our unfortunate kids!!!  Luckily they were WONDERFUL and adjusted to us SOOO well.  I feel bad that their first days with us they certainly did not get our best...we won NO parenting awards those first few weeks. 

Anyhow, after getting back home to the U.S. we had some time off of work to bond with the kids and stay home with them 24/7.  It was great, albeit somewhat difficult getting used to being parents while feeling so gross you just want to jab something sharp in your side, bleed out, and end it all.  But, then again, that's just me being overdramatic.  I do that. 

So, one afternoon we were giving the kids their post-nap snack.  Feeling all sorts of yucky, I put a mug of water in the microwave to heat up to use with Thera-Flu.  I set it for ONE MINUTE (remember's important). 

I finished gathering the snack, brought it to the table, and started to feed it to the kids when I heard a bell ding.  I was confused.  I wondered what the bell we weren't cooking anything - we were just feeding the kids bananas and crackers. 

I asked my wife, "what's in the microwave?"  in a somewhat dazed, confused, and (okay I admit it) irritable tone.  She replied, "the water you JUST put in the microwave a second ago."

Yes, that is how CRAZY the first few weeks of being an adoptive family can be.  Crazy awesome and full of joy... yes.  But, also so crazy busy and chaotic that when I didn't feel well I COMPLETELY LOST MY MIND and couldn't remember that I put water in the microwave JUST ONE MINUTE BEFORE!!!

Now, being disoriented and spacey is not something I am used to...but, I'm learning that sometimes it just comes along with parenthood.  A parents mind is pulled in many directions at any given moment...and sometimes you feel like if your body didn't just automatically breathe for you... you'd forget to. 

Anyhow, now when we (my wife and I) are feeling especially overwhelmed, forgetful, or just plain looney...we say "what's in the microwave?"  That lets the other one know, "hey, my mind is currently unavailable at this time....check in with me later, please."  

Funny, it seems like we are wondering what's in the microwave a lot these days.  Wonder if we'll ever start remembering...or if this is just our new state of mind.  :-)

Signing off...have a good one.


Saturday, October 8, 2011

It's my goal to P.I.S.S. U. O.F.F.

So, recently my supervisor asked for help coming up with an acronym for our office that would explain what we do etc...

It took me a few minutes, but I was quickly able to offer up a couple of suggestions.

"Whines Til Friday"  = WTF

Or my favorite, which included within it the fact that we are a christian organization. 

Providing Immediate Satisfactory Service Under Our Faithful Father

The tag line would read:

It's our goal to P.I.S.S.  U.  O.F.F!!

I personally think it is a pure stroke of genius.  However, after I submitted my suggestion I was informed that they were going to go ahead and go another direction.  Oh well, THEIR loss....  I definitely should be in marketing.  I mean, C'mon!!...who would forget THAT??? 


Thursday, October 6, 2011

Corn Flakes are a lot like Laundry Detergent...

Okay.  So, I'm one of those people that likes to read random articles online and learn about all sorts of useless crap.  Sometimes the stuff I read actually contains some valuable information and oftentimes it is just drivel. 

However, I had seen mentioned a few different times in a few different places that most people use much more laundry detergent in each load than actually necessary.  In fact, most of us use so much detergent in each wash that our clothes are suffering from the abuse.  They are wearing out quicker, getting stiffer, and are full of soap residue which makes them dingy and causes us to need to replace these items sooner. 

Why do so many of us do this?  Oh yeah, because we (like suckers, apparently) follow the directions on the box (or bottle) and use the amount RECOMMENDED by the manufacturer.  Silly us!  Why on earth would we think that following the directions is in the best interest of us and our clothes?  I mean, who ever got ahead or was rewarded in any way, shape, or form for doing what they are told?  So, why do we start submitting now...when the life of our favorite t-shirt is at stake!?!!  It's insanity I tell you!!

So, really?  Detergent manufacturer's are so hard up that they blatantly deceive us into using more of their product than necessary (or even advisable) so that we will run out sooner and buy more?  It's a conspiracy I tell you!!!  The detergent manufacturers are in cahoots with the clothing manufacturers.  You see, they BOTH benefit.  We use more and more detergent (laundry detergent company wins) which causes our clothes to deteriorate and get all dingy and nasty sooner... and then we have to go out and buy more clothes (clothing manufacturers win).  So, who is the big loser in all of this?  Us, OUR wallets..... AND our favorite pair of underwear too!!! 

Anyhow, now that we got THAT all cleared up and you all now know to use 1/3 to 1/2 of what the packaging states, I will move on to the real point of the story.

So, my wife (who is lovely by the way) tends to have eyes bigger than her stomach.  Not a big deal, right? We all have moments where we strugge with that.  Anyhow, she repeatedly seems to pour herself a huge bowl of cereal and then only eat about a third of it before she is stuffed and has to stop.

So, I (like a good husband) try to keep my mouth shut for the most part and not say: "oh, yeah...uh, maybe next time only make an amount you can actually eat."   MANY times (throughout 5+ years of marriage) of seeing this occur I was successful and just remained silent. However, one night I thought to make my point while using the laundry detergent example.  You see, my wife actually was glad when I told her about the articles I read on laundry detergent.  She was more than fine with using less of it and it is one of those few occasions where my random reading actually caused something in our lives to change. We now use less detergent.  Save some some clothes.  Yay us.

ANYWAYS:  On this particular evening as my smokin' wife comes to the table with a HUGE bowl of cereal, I say:  "So, I was reading this article on"  Now, this is not at all an unusual way for me to start a sentence/conversation.  Remember, I mentioned I am always reading about random crap on the internet.

Back to the story:  "So, I was reading this article on  It was saying how cereal is a lot like laundry detergent, in that you really need to use MUCH less than you would initially assume."   There was a bit of a pause and a "say what?" expression for a minute, as I did a good job at keeping a straight face and informative tone.  When she realized that I was full of crap and mocking her after a second or two she laughed and muttered something about me needing to be nice.  Whatevs.  I'm pretty nice, for the most part...but, I just couldn't resist!

Now whenever we are tempted to fill our plates, bowls, or whatever with too much food we make sure to say:  "cereal is a lot like laundry detergent."  It puts it all in to perspective.


Tuesday, October 4, 2011

I L.O.V.E. Diet Pepsi

Okay, so I may as well be up front and honest from the get go and tell y'all.... "I got me some issues!"

No, not with drug and alcohol addiction.  I have not found myself lying drunken and high in a ditch, nor have I woken up wondering where I was and who was next to me.  But, I do have a dark and seedy secret addiction.  Well, actually - no I don't.  Everybody that knows me, well.... in REAL life, knows of my dirty little secret. So, I guess it's not all THAT secret after all.

I must have Diet Pepsi.  I mean, I'm not sure if I can even function without it.  I guess that's not totally true, as I did do without it in Ethiopia for 2 weeks this year, but that was only because they didn't sell it there.  Anyhow, let's just say I have an unhealthy dependant-relationship with Diet Pepsi. 

Before you get all judgemental on me... let me remind some of you about coffee.  There are those of you who finish a pot of coffee (or have done a "Starbucks run") before I even wake up.  It's pretty much the same as that....except I drink Diet Pepsi from the moment I wake up until the moment I go to sleep.   Not that I am drinking constantly, but I do like to spread the joy out all throughout the day. 

I'm not even slightly concerned with the caffeine and fact that it probably contributes to me not being a very good sleeper.  I haven't slept well for like 4 years or so... so why start worrying about it and pretending to care now?

Anyways, as I was saying, Diet Pepsi completes me.  Literally. You know that 90% (or some ridiculously high number so I am told) of us (humans) that is water?  Well, like 80% of MY 90% is Diet Pepsi.  It's running through my veins.  Maybe that's why I'm always chilly! 

Some may think it is an odd and inappropriate obsession.  But, I say "what's not to love?"  I mean the sweet goodness, the fizz, the sound of the fizz as you unscrew the lid off of a 2 liter bottle.  Ah...... GLORIOUS! 

I mean, I don't even get how people can eat pizza, tacos, nachos, or chocolate without it???!!  It goes well with everything, even the healthy items I failed to mention above.  It just goes particularly well with some of the world's most unhealthy menu choices. 

Anyhow, I just thought you should know that I am a social drinker (of D.P.) AND I drink alone at home in the dark.  I don't get drunk, but... it does make me happy nonetheless. 

Oh, Diet Pepsi, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways....


Monday, October 3, 2011

It is what it is....

So, here it is.  An official record of my train wreck of thoughts...aren't you in for a treat!!

I like to write, and for the time being this is going to be my outlet for just that.  Follow it if you want...uh, or don't.  I don't really care.  At this point, I think this is much more for me than it is you (the reader), just get over yourself and move on if this is not to your liking.

The plan is for me to write about whatever random things come up.  Sometimes the blog will have a focus and direction, and sometimes it may not.  However, I do promise to always be at least somewhat entertaining.  Well, I guess only to those who find sarcastic and irreverent ramblings entertaining.  I'm sure there are a few of you out there!

Anyhow, as for the title of this blog:  "It's Time To Get Over Yourself!"  Well, again...that is for me as much as it is for you.  I know that when it comes down to it, many people's biggest problem is themselves.  I certainly know that NO ONE gets in my way more than me!  So, this blog will at times be used to encourage myself AND others to stop tripping over themselves, to get over their own insecurities and hang ups, and to move on and get done what needs to get done.  This is something I am constantly working on.  I am getting better at it...but, know, old habits die hard. 

I definitely think that before an individual can get over themselves they...uh, er...need to first know themselves.  For some, this is easier said than done.  Many are not too keen on exploring the inner workings of their being. If this is you, take some time to think about that.  If you need a personality or strengths assessment to help you start thinking along those lines (of knowing yourself), than by all means... use one!

For me this is one area I don't tend to struggle with necessarily.  If anything, I think (who am I kidding...I obsess) too much about what's going on in my head and why I am the way I am. At times, I think I am introspective to my own detriment...if that's even possible.  I tend to over think EVERYTHING!!  I guess what I am saying is that it is great to have yourself some intrapersonal skills. But, if all you do is think and never ACT on what knowledge that thinking has revealed...well, then - it's time to get over yourself. 

That's where I'm at.  I'm not totally useless...I mean, I've got some of my crap worked out.  I'm pretty high functioning in general....BUT, I could certainly use a kick in the butt here and there.   I'm assuming I am not alone in this and that there's SOMEONE out there that can identify with this.  If not, oh well... I'll survive, even without you validating my feelings.  Okay, now I'm just being difficult for the sake of it.  It must be time for bed...I get cranky as my body starts to shut down and demand sleep.  :-)

Good night,